Jerri Blank: Take him backstage behind the meat curtain, know what I mean? Jerri Blank: You can be rich in family, or friends, or love; but the only thing that matters is being rich in money. Call your parents, have them come and pick you up. P.S. Columbus here, fighting the pilgrims as they attempt to land. Jerri Blank: Come on, pick me. Chuck Noblet: Sometimes that can be just as painful. Bring a book.”, “I’ll never slap you around, unless of course you get out of line.”, “I don’t have to make the debate team. And I’m not the same Jerri Blank who took a crap in the Fleishmann’s holly bushes… last night.” — explaining why she doesn’t want to finger Kimberly Timbers for being a retard, from “Who Wants Cake?”.
Principal Onyx Blackman: Jerri, I'm an obtuse man, so I'll try to be oblique. Jerri Blank: What? And then I laughed…really hard.” — from “Dreams on the Rocks”, “You’re just a rack of bones covered in a thin layer of fag.” — to Derrick, from “Blank Relay”, “Pee on me.” — to Tammi Littlenut at the Horizon Motel, from “A Burden’s Burden”, “And as for that little redheaded spitfire, Tammi Littlenut. I haven't. Derrick? Why does your finger smell like his ass?” — to Derrick and P.John, from “Let Freedom Ring”, “I do like black people. Charles 'Chuck' Noblet: SHUT YOUR DIRTY LITTLE MOUTH! You thinking about buying some steaks?' Principal Onyx Blackman: Stop by the nurse's office after lunch to pick up your free uniforms. Jerri Blank: Dr. Trepanning, can you get all the crazy out of my daddy? Drake Rogers: Cus you didn't spread those vicious thighs. And I'm a caribou. G-spot!


And he says 'No! Jerri Blank: Well, I have to go to the ladies room. Jerri Blank: No, no, never. Jerri Blank: First of all, I don't like people.

Gonads!

It first aired on April 7, 1999, and concluded its third and final season on October 2, 2000. Craig Snow: You need to face the fact that your mother is an alcoholic, but Jerri, that doesn't mean she doesn't love you. Orlando Pinatubo: We don't call you that. Jerri Blank: Orlando, you can't be a pilgrim.

Jerri Blank: I cried when I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. Jerri Blank: "Packing a Musket", by Jerri Blank. Jerri Blank: Fandango? That will show those sons of bitches, especially Noblet. But nothing too faggy. First up, Jerri Blank. But now I’m out of jail, picking up my life exactly where I left off. Tammi Littlenut: What do you mean, Jerri? “Hello, I’m Jerri Blank and I’m a 46-year-old high school freshman. Geoffrey Jellineck: Jellineck. I was just looking for my classroom! Jerri Blank: [Jerry stealthily slips her hand over the red bulb] Kitten?